International Women’s Day, Status of Afghan Women, and Dilemma of Today’s Afghanistan Society
Being a woman in Afghanistan is a paradox. It is like living in the pages of Thus Spoke Zarathustra, where the infamous phrase is found: “When you go to women, don’t forget the whip.”
By Aman Shadkam
When we look at the history of women worldwide, some appalling realities become evident. In every land, women were considered second-class citizens, barred from participating in political and social gatherings and confined to a life limited to three options: obedience to their husbands, household chores, and bearing children every two years. According to societal and marital standards, the ideal woman obeyed her husband, gave birth annually, or preferably had twins.
As Anthony Giddens states in his book Sociology, there is no place in the world where men have not dominated women. Everywhere, women have primarily been responsible for child-rearing, homemaking, and household management (p. 205).
History teaches us that in third-world societies, women were also engaged in spinning, weaving, sewing, and other tasks in addition to household duties. Pamela Abbott, in her book Sociology of Women, notes that women in the third world face worse and more miserable conditions than men. They have less power and autonomy, work more, and earn less. Household chores and family care fall solely on women; even in agricultural settings, they labor alongside their husbands.
However, this situation does not last indefinitely. Societies are evolving, and time brings change whether we like it or not. As societies become more complex, they demand modern and rational individuals. On page 208 of Giddens’ Sociology, it is explained that societies gradually moved toward industrialization, establishing factories and shifting work from a family-based system to an individual one. Women, having little work left to do at home, were compelled to enter the workforce.
By 1910, one-third of women in England were employed, mainly young and unmarried. Divorced women were not allowed to work in factories, and wages earned by working women were often sent directly to their parents. Upon marriage, women were dismissed from their jobs. Similarly, on page 175 of Sociology of Women, it is stated that before the Industrial Revolution of the 19th century, women worked alongside their fathers and husbands at home without receiving wages, considering it their duty. However, the Industrial Revolution changed everything—women no longer worked for free and sought employment outside the house to earn their own living.
The issue of employment for single and married women became a pressing matter. Only young and single women could work in factories, while married women were often prohibited from employment or even leaving their homes. In the truest sense, marriage acted as a barrier for women—once married, they lost their right to work or move freely, with all responsibilities falling upon their husbands. A woman’s role was clear: bearing children and fulfilling her husband’s needs. Men often viewed employed women, especially married ones, as a threat to their status as breadwinners (Sociology of Women, p. 176). They feared that if women entered the workforce, men would become unemployed as women abandoned domestic duties and encroached on men’s job opportunities. Thus, many men saw married women’s employment as disgraceful and indecent, considering working women a direct challenge to their honor and masculinity.
However, women did not remain passive. Seizing opportunities, they formed labor unions after the Industrial Revolution, advocating for married women’s right to work. They took to the streets, demanding access to education, which was a privilege reserved for men at the time. After much resistance, women eventually gained the right to study medicine, and in the decades that followed, the first women’s movement emerged in the wake of the French Revolution (1789). 1790, women’s clubs were established in Paris, where educated and conscious women gathered, calling for equality and justice. They harshly criticized the government and politicians, arguing that men had historically oppressed women, imposed their authoritarian rule over them, and reduced them to secondary, incomplete beings.
Marie Gouze, a leader of one such club, issued the Declaration of the Rights of Women, modeled after the Declaration of the Rights of Man and Citizen, arguing that the right to freedom and equality should not be limited to men alone. She questioned how true equality could be achieved when half the population was deprived of the same privileges granted to men. Eventually, she was executed by the French government. Marie Gouze made it clear to the authoritarian rulers of France that women’s capabilities had been ignored, emphasizing that it was inhumane to expect women to serve men and bear children while being denied any role in shaping their children’s futures. She argued that this was a burial of justice, equality, and humanity.
By 1991, women’s employment had expanded significantly, with 98% of working women employed as secretaries in various offices—a significant milestone for women.
The Status of Afghan Women
It is crucial to examine the condition of Afghan women today, as they endure immense humiliation, oppression, verbal and sexual harassment and remain silent in their pain. In the confines of their homes, they grapple with psychological distress. When we speak of Afghan women, we talk of unspoken suffering, of women crushed by humiliation and degradation. These women sit in the corners of their homes, whispering their shattered dreams—or, having been suffocated by societal injustice and male arrogance, have lost the will to dream altogether. Like the living dead, they breathe mechanically, enduring the filth of their husbands at night and waking to relentless household chores by day.
Being a woman in Afghanistan is a paradox. It is like living in the pages of Thus Spoke Zarathustra, where the infamous phrase is found: “When you go to women, don’t forget the whip.” Some theorists believe Nietzsche borrowed this line from Francis Bacon, who once said, “When you approach nature, strike it with a stick.” Others argue that Nietzsche directed this statement toward his lover, Lou Salomé, who abandoned him due to his sexual inadequacy. One must exhume Nietzsche or resurrect him to ask to determine the truth. But that is, of course, impossible.
As for Afghan women, one might as well reverse Nietzsche’s statement: When you approach men, do not forget the staff of retribution. This would make more sense. In our society, it is men who abuse and beat women—not the other way around.
In my village, there were two men notorious for physically abusing their wives. Unfortunately, both lived close by—one right next door to us. If a week passed without them beating their wives, it meant they were sick. I vividly remember one winter morning. The air was freezing, and even the moisture on my lips had turned to ice. As I stepped outside and reached the front gate, I heard the cries and wails of our neighbor’s wife.
I had grown accustomed to it because he had beaten his wife so many times. I listened closely and realized that her husband was mercilessly beating her. The sounds of the blows landing were clearly audible. Despite being disabled, the man had no restraint when it came to beating his wife. Similarly, our next-door neighbor also beat his wives. This esteemed gentleman often grabbed his wife by the hair or locked the door from the inside and beat her relentlessly until he was out of breath.
Simone de Beauvoir’s famous quote from the first volume of “The Second Sex”—“One is not born a woman, but rather becomes one”—resonates deeply with the reality of our society. In our culture, the moment a child is born, the first thing people look at is between the child’s legs to determine their gender. Once the gender is identified, a series of discriminatory practices follow, including differences in food, clothing, and privileges. From early childhood, boys and girls are treated differently. Parents give more importance to sons, and such ignorant disparities begin from a very young age.
The horrifying conditions of women in villages can be understood through newspapers, weekly magazines, local news, the book “Talismans,” and the book “Return to Death,” which depict the humiliation and suffering endured by women in rural areas. In fact, it is difficult to even call it “life”—it is more of an existence defined by habit and endurance. Women in villages become accustomed to their husbands’ tyranny and arduous labor. Their minds are conditioned to believe that their fate is predetermined and that humiliation and suffering are imposed by God and destiny—something beyond human intervention.
In the book “Talismans,” Jawad Khavari writes that the ideal woman in the eyes of men remains silent in front of her husband. Most men in villages consider women inferior and insignificant, believing that discussing important matters with them is inappropriate. Any man who does so is seen as weak and dominated by his wife. For example, on page 48 of “Talismans,” a man named Peyvand is quoted saying, “God created women for corruption.” Similarly, Mullah Yaqub says, “If women had not been created, humanity would still be in paradise.”
The book “Return to Death” highlights the ignorant customs of rural communities in a distressing and sorrowful manner. On page 75, Yaqub Yasna recounts the tragic story of a girl named Shakiba, who was murdered by a relative, and her body was thrown into a water canal. Her corpse remained missing for a while until a village shepherd found it, and the villagers respectfully buried her. However, after Shakiba’s burial, several of her relatives died, leaving everyone bewildered. Eventually, the village mullah declared in a sermon that Shakiba had been a “demon,” and the only solution was to exhume and burn her body. Following the mullah’s orders, villagers dug up her battered corpse at night and set it on fire.
Women in Afghanistan’s cities are not safe either, facing various forms of oppression and exploitation. Women are often hired in government offices as mere tokens rather than for their skills and qualifications. Otherwise, why are attractive women with well-proportioned bodies more likely to be employed? Numerous real-life cases exist where women in government and private offices face harassment but remain silent due to societal pressure and concerns about their reputations. Countless dangerous incidents occur in urban areas, but they rarely come to light.
In the book “The Precious Prostitutes,” the author attempts to document the disgraceful conditions of women in Kabul. One story describes a man who, in a gambling game, loses his teenage daughter. He raises her, and once she reaches puberty, he sells her for one night to an Arab man at a Kabul hotel. From that night onward, she is forced into prostitution, surrendering her body to men day and night.
Similarly, in the book “The Price of Virginity,” a woman named Sadaf is exploited by her husband because she lacks a hymen. He takes her to Kabul’s brothels at night to make money. Beyond these literary accounts, distressing stories frequently emerge on social media. Sometimes, female university students are sexually assaulted by their professors, and sometimes, religious clerics molest their own students.
It is undeniable that extremism in Afghanistan has reached its peak. More often than not, extremists target women because they are considered relatively innocent and easily deceived. Particularly when matters of God, magic, and sorcery are involved, women’s rational judgment is often clouded, making them vulnerable to exploitation. For instance, the sexual relations between Mullah Landi and women are directly linked to their ignorance and blind faith. Under the pretext of curing infertility, he engaged in sexual acts with them, and the women, believing in his power, willingly submitted. Such exploitation stems from two leading causes: the fear of divorce and deeply ingrained superstitions. These factors push women into submission and deception. However, albeit rarely, some women resist such superstition and take a stand against deceit and irrational beliefs.
Women’s criminal behavior is a topic of discussion in both third-world and first-world countries. Some women willingly or unwillingly resort to unexpected crimes, such as theft, which may be incomprehensible to others. In reality, when a woman commits robbery or murder, people fail to consider the circumstances that led to her actions and instead perceive her behavior as sheer immorality. For example, imagine a woman sitting at home with her husband gone and a child crying from hunger. In desperation, she may feel compelled to steal from a shop or engage in sex work to feed her child.
Some criminologists attribute female delinquency to two factors: genetics/environment and social conditions. The genetic aspect is linked to a woman’s psychological and familial background, while the social aspect pertains to the environment in which she was born, lived, and grew up. The book “Sociology of Women” presents statistics on female crime in England (1986), showing that male crimes far exceed female crimes. On page 213, it is noted that the rate of home burglaries committed by women is roughly equal to that of men. However, women cannot be considered wholly innocent or faultless, as no one in society is entirely pure.
In Afghanistan, for instance, women submit to Mullah Landi, university professors, and office managers. The reality of Afghan women is reflected in the television series “Shahrzad,” where the protagonist, forced into an unwanted marriage, initially resists but eventually submits and falls in love with her captor. Afghan women, much like Shahrzad, gradually accept and adjust to oppressive marriages.
Tragically, this notion has become a cultural norm among Afghans. Parents forcibly marry off their daughters, believing that over time, they will adapt to their husbands. Afghan women can be compared to sheep, trained to accept whatever fate befalls them, or to parasites that rely on others to survive.
